Hosea's Wife

The Lord said to me, “Go, show your love to your wife again, though she is loved by another man and is an adulteress. Love her as the LORD loves the Israelites, though they turn to other gods and love the sacred raisin cakes.”

Hosea 3:1

I recently heard a story about a man and a woman who filed for divorce after thirteen years of marriage. Digging deeper into the circumstances surrounding the divorce, my heart broke for the young man. He had endured thirteen years of a marriage in which his beloved proved to be unfaithful numerous times, and yet each time, the man re-opened his arms to his false-hearted wife and accepted her back into his home. He had endured thirteen years of a marriage in which his beloved betrayed his trust numerous times, and yet each time, the man showed her grace upon grace and granted her another chance. He had endured thirteen years of a marriage in which his beloved continuously broke his heart into a thousand tiny pieces left on the floor as she turned her face away from the remnants and chased her own desires, and yet each time, the man picked up the pieces of his paper heart and held them out to his vagrant wife as the only offering he had left to give. He had endured thirteen years of a marriage in which his patience was tried, his faith was tested, and his love was worn thin, and yet it was not he, but his wife, who filed for the divorce.

After hearing this story, I could not wrap my head around the fact that even after his wife cheated on him time and time again, this young man still took her back into his loving arms. I could not understand why this woman was so selfish that she would see her husband’s arms wide open, pleading with her to come home to him, and still deny his love. I could not grasp the idea that this woman would be so willing to cause such tremendous pain and heartbreak to a man who had been guilty of nothing but showing her unconditional love and grace.

And then it hit me…

Is this not what I do every day? Am I not guilty of the exact same sin as the young woman? Do I not abuse my Beloved’s unconditional love and grace upon grace every single day?

I am the young woman, the wife who proves to be unfaithful numerous times.

I am the young woman, the wife who betrays her Husband’s trust time and time again.

I am the young woman, the wife who continues to break her Husband’s heart into a thousand tiny pieces left on the floor.

I am the young woman, the wife who turns her face away from the remnants of her Husband’s heart and chases her own desires.

And yet, no matter how many times I prove to be unfaithful, there is One who re-opens His arms to guide me home.

No matter how many times I betray His trust, there is One who bestows grace upon grace and grants me another chance.

No matter how many times I break His heart, there is One who picks up the broken pieces and holds them back out to me in the form of an old rugged cross on a mount called Calvary.

I am the vagrant wife, and Jesus is my Husband.

I am simply a wandering soul, flirting with the world every chance I get, lusting over worldly pleasures that I have no right to. I am falling in-love with the world when a perfect kind of love is being offered to me. The heartbreaking part is that I see this perfect, unconditional love and yet I continue to abuse it. I continue to break my Husband’s heart and turn my face away from the remnants and towards my own selfish desires. I turn away from the Light and towards the Dark, thinking that the Dark will fill me with lasting joy and fulfillment; however, that is not the case. For I end up feeling utterly empty and lost, and it is then that I reach out to the One whose arms are still open in a desperate plea for my soul to return home.

And so I run. It is at rock bottom, when I am tired and burdened and broken-hearted, that I realize lasting joy and fulfillment has been in front of me all along and I run. I run to the One who is the giver of life, joy, and fulfillment.

I run to Love Himself, and He gives freely.

I am so undeserving, and yet Christ is so relentless. No matter how many times my heart strays towards the Dark, the Light will guide me home and His love will never let me go.